I feel strange to have this start.
All girls, oh no, should be all human, have their own imagination about first love. Could possibly covered by sweet, hard, happiness, suffering, laugh, tears.... Expect to have sparkle, to make life different, really deep enjoyed everything happened between two.
I'm, almost there, 29, and just very recently get into a first relationship. Until now I'm happy, at least most of the time. He is not an ideal man in my whole imagination & fantasy, but is a good choice to share a life with.
Still, I'm not familiar with this feeling, the feeling that people called "Love", and he already said that thousand time. I'm happy with that but feel insecure at the same time...
For me, is it love? or just because he is the only show up when I felt depress? ... I'm confused. I like more the moment when we talk about things sentimental, things deep in the heard, secrets. However, I can felt he is not that kind of person. He shined like a sunshine, I'm not sure if he will accept my dark side.... I'm not an optimist by nature. An optimistic person thinks the best possible thing will happen, and hopes for it even if it's not likely. But for my part, I'm always prepared for the worth case happen.
I promised myself to be truly honest to my heart. And the truth is I never want to be a strong person, don't want to be a tough girl. I have tears and I want to cry out...... Really wish someone understand my fears.....
I am who I am, and I don't wanna hide anymore.....
